Sly accentuates the positiveSly Stone, the leader, songwriter, and record producer for Sly and the Family Stone, passed away recently at the age of 82. Very late in life, Sly decided to get off drugs and write his autobiography. Entitled Thank You (Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin), it was published in 2023. The book includes an introduction by Questlove, leader of the Roots (Jimmy Fallon’s Tonight Show band). Questlove was also the publisher of the book, through his company AUWA books.
In 1998, rock journalist Joel Selvin published Sly and the Family Stone: An Oral History, which contained first-hand testimony from many members of Sly’s band, family, and entourage. That book painted a very dark portrait of Sly. As he became more famous and wealthy, his drug use increased, and he became progressively more unhinged, at times allegedly threatening those close to him with violence. Sly’s Thank You reads like it was written in response to the stories told in Selvin’s book. Rather than own up to any wrongdoing, Sly either responds to such accusations with denial or ignores them entirely, opting for safer subjects. He discusses all of his recordings, album by album, with a sentence or two about most songs. He spends a few chapters giving detailed recaps of his talk show appearances. There’s a chapter about his wedding, which took place on stage in Madison Square Garden, plus a lot of name-dropping of celebrities he often hung out with or just met once.
Sly (and perhaps Questlove) wants you to come away from this book with the idea that he was an artist that was taken advantage of and creatively stifled by the music industry, but that’s a difficult theory to buy into. The book is filled with instances of people going out of their way to give Sly the opportunity to do what he does best (including Michael Jackson, for one), but Sly chooses to sabotage his own career with his drug use and his self-destructive behavior. Sly had a reputation for skipping out on scheduled concerts, not only dissing his fans but also his own band. Here he blames everybody but himself for those numerous no-shows. Sly confesses that he used a lot of drugs, and that he liked them, but he fails to mention much of the scary behavior that Selvin’s book discusses at length. In Selvin’s Oral History, there is a very harrowing story told by Sly’s ex-wife about how his unfed pit bull mauled their toddler son. Sly, however, dispatches the incident in two sentences. Much like Keith Richards’s autobiography Life, there’s much bragging about drug use, partying, and macho tough-guy brandishing of weapons. Richards, at least, seems to respect women, while Sly seems to view them as his sexual servants. Overall, Sly comes across as a child who never grew up. He wants what he wants, when he wants it, regardless of the consequences, and he needs managers and girlfriends to take care of his basic needs because he’s incapable of doing so himself. Sly mentions his friend Bobby Womack often in this book. Sly could have learned a thing or two from Bobby about how to write a memoir. Womack’s My Story is candid, forthright, and accountable, the exact opposite of Sly’s Thank You.
One thing this book does well is capture the conversational voice of Sly. Though I’m sure it required some unsung effort on the part of coauthor Ben Greenman, this memoir is written as if it came straight out of Sly’s mouth. Sly claims credit for initiating the phrase, “Different strokes for different folks” (from his song “Everyday People”), and this book is chock full of similar funky, pithy aphorisms, many of which rhyme. As an orator, Sly falls somewhere between Snoop Dogg and Nipsey Russell. The prose is enjoyable to read, but what it has to say isn’t always pleasant. I love the man’s music, but when all is said and done, I didn’t come away from this liking Sly. Maybe I’m wrong, and Sly was a wonderful human being, but that’s not the impression one gets from this book.
From genius to nightmare in a few albumsSly and the Family Stone still get some radio airplay on classic rock stations, but most people under the age of 60 are unlikely to remember or comprehend the level of fame and critical acclaim this band achieved in their heyday. Formed and led by the incomparable musician and songwriter Sly Stone (born Sylvester Stewart), the Family Stone was one of the first prominent bands to feature black and white artists, and men and women, making rock and roll music together. And no one was a token member. While the band was in its prime, Sly made sure everyone got their juicy riffs and solos. When people my age praise what a musical genius Prince was, I can’t help thinking Prince learned 90% of what he knew from Sly and the Family Stone.
First published in 1998, Sly and the Family Stone: An Oral History, is a biography of the band compiled by rock journalist Joel Selvin. The text of this oral history is assembled from interviews with about forty different persons who lived and/or worked with Sly and the band. Notably absent from the interviewees is Sly himself. It would have been nice if he were present here to defend himself, but given that he’s been a recluse since the 1980s, that would be an unrealistic expectation. All of the other members of the Family Stone participated in Selvin’s project, with the exception of “Little Sister” Rose Stone. KC and Alpha Stewart, parents to Sly, Freddie, Rose, and Vaetta Stewart/Stone, tell their side of the story, as does Sly’s ex-wife. Most of the other participants are managers, bodyguards, record company execs, and other members of the entourage. There aren’t many big-name stars among the speakers, but Bobby Womack, Grace Slick, and the Grateful Dead’s Mickey Hart are among the few notable rock and rollers who testify.
I’ve always found oral history to be an excellent format for rock and roll biography, especially when the artist in question has lived a scary and terrible life (see many episodes of VH1’s Behind the Music). A prime example would be the formidable I’ll Sleep When I’m Dead: The Dirty Life and Times of Warren Zevon, but in terms of self-destruction, paranoia, and violent behavior, Sly may have Warren beat. The story the participants tell here is really a shocking and tragic tale.
Sly was a musical genius who wrote songs and produced records even as a teenager. He was a successful radio DJ in San Francisco before he decided to form his own band. Sly and the Family Stone blew the crowd away at Woodstock and put out classic albums like Stand! and There’s a Riot Goin’ On. Sly’s songs told of a better way of life in which love and brotherhood triumphed over oppression and hate.
The story behind the scenes, however, was much darker. Sly turned into a control freak, not just in the studio but outside as well. With escalating fame came escalating drug use, including a proclivity for PCP. Members of the band often lived together in Sly’s homes amidst his large collections of guns and dogs. (There is a dog story in this book that is one of the most incredibly harrowing scenes I’ve ever read.) Sly’s bodyguards behaved like mob goons, allegedly beating up band members. Sly’s derangement got to the point where he considered showing up for concerts to be optional. Over time he isolated himself more and more, until the Family Stone became a one-man band. This book is more than just a hatchet session by the people interviewed. Despite the broken hearts, physical injuries, and shattered careers, one can sense that they truly cared about Sly. His decline was a tremendous squandering of artistic potential. This oral history is definitely not a feel-good story, but it does make for a riveting and eye-opening read.
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